– Bill Murray, Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them – Franklin P. Jones, Anybody who finds it easy to make money on the horses is probably in the dog food business. Votes: 3 Don't worry. I can’t even imagine the self control required to work at a bubble wrap factory. 3 You can tell how boring a person is by the lack of fear in their eyes when someone is … Teacher: Where is your book?
So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it. You're safe.
That means every statement, every interview, every tweet – completely sober. Showing search results for "Funny Smart Clever" sorted by relevance. Look officer, I'm not being a smartass. – Chetan Bhagat, It’s better not to argue with women. – Franklin P. Jones, When you get something for nothing, you just haven’t been billed for it yet. Whatever you do, always give 100%. I feel ten years older already.
Student: Why are you teaching during my conversation? "Success is a lousy teacher. – Chetan Bhagat, The pretty girl is always right.
– Vladimir Putin, Don’t do drugs, don’t have sex, and don’t touch your eyebrows. Our collection of funny quotes which are short, easy to remember but still hilarious “All my life I tho air was free until I bough bag of chips.” 1. – Emilia Clarke, Donald Trump does not touch alcohol, which is really respectable. Votes: 3 Homework: 2+2+4=8 I am sitting here looking at the most amazing person I have ever seen, smart, funny, caring, and absolutely stunning! Pretty strong. - Bill Gates
“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” -Confucius 14. Pretty funny.
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Votes: 6 John C. Maxwell – Tim Gunn, Girls never tell you anything straight out anyway. It is only painful for others. Yes, I am looking in the mirror! – Tim Vine, Nothing in life is fun for the whole family.
Student: Having more fun than me. But I think it’s Colin. Once you get past my charm, good looks, intelligence and my sense of humor, I think it’s my modesty that stands out. Dont let your ears witness what your eyes didn't see...& don't let your mouth speak what your heart doesn't feel.
They’ll encourage you to death. My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.
It seduces smart people into thinking they can't lose."
She was smart and funny and vulnerable and just so goddamned beautiful, the kind of beautiful that was worth being shot down over. – Chetan Bhagat, The world’s most funniest and easiest thing is to give an advice…
– Lynn Johnston, Every time I “get with the program”… somebody changes the channel. Votes: 0, Being humble matters.
But go outside in pajamas, and you’ll run into every ex you have. I got used to dealing with groups of boys and getting on with life in unpleasant circumstances and being smart and funny and subversive at the expense of authority.
“When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.” – Norm Crosby “As you get older three things happen.
A smart lawyer can keep a killer out of jail, a smart accountant can keep a thief from paying taxes, a smart reporter could ruin your reputation- unfairly. Smart phones, smart cars, smart televisions... when are they going to start making smart people?
Pretty smart. While a rich man cannot have more than 1440 minutes a day, a clever man makes more time by using OPM or Other Peoples Minutes. Zombies are looking for brains.
Or my older brother, Colin. – Mark Twain, When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, it seems like two minutes; when you sit on a hot stove for two minutes, it seems like two hours. Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair. Letâs be pretty kind. Yes, I am looking in the mirror! Remember, when you are dead, you do not know you are dead. There are some idiots who always answer “No” to every question, now tell me. Teacher: Excuse me?
– Lou Duva, With age comes wisdom, but sometimes age comes alone. – Bill Gates, When you are dining with a demon, you got to have a long spoon. It’s like asking runners how they run, or singers how they sing. It’s just that I stay with problems longer.” -Albert Einstein 13. Like not having anything to wear.
They just do it! Votes: 0, I got used to dealing with groups of boys and getting on with life in unpleasant circumstances and being smart and funny and subversive at the expense of authority. – Navjot Sidhu, Beware of the naked man who offers you his shirt.
Unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything.
Custom and user added quotes with pictures. Maxwell Smart: … Or my younger brother, Ho-Chan-Chu. Stop hating on smartasses. I don’t care what others say or think about me, at least I am attractive to mosquitoes. Teacher: Get out a sheet of paper Student: LOOK AT ME NOW! If life give you lemons make some lemonade, if it gives you coconut throw it at the person you hate. Teacher: Why are you talking during my lesson?
12. Is like cannibals saying they don't eat clowns because the taste funny. Agent 99: I'm sure you're right, Max but look, there's not a sign of any damage. Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them.
I said, 'Kindergarten'. Ash Sweeney But think about that. S T U P I D = Smart Talented Unique Person In Demand. Student: At home. “It’s not that I’m so smart. – Chetan Bhagat, LIFE IS TOUGH WHEN YOU ARE ALWAYS TALKING TO PEOPLE SMARTER THAN YOU.. – Hasan Minhaj, Being married means I can break wind and eat ice cream in bed. – Franklin P. Jones, The British have a remarkable talent for keeping calm, even when there is no crisis.
– Chetan Bhagat, From biscuit to brides, if there is anything their children really want, parents have a problem. I’m not shy, I’m just really good at figuring out who’s worth talking to.
Votes: 0, She was smart and funny and vulnerable and just so goddamned beautiful, the kind of beautiful that was worth being shot down over. Being a black woman, there's so many different sides of us. – Franklin P. Jones, A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist. A police officer came up to me yesterday and said, 'Where were you between four and six?'
Pretty smart.
– Navjot Sidhu, Some so speak in exaggerations and superlatives that we need to make a large discount from their statements before we can come at their real meaning. Kevin Hart, Funny is an attitude. There are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry.
You have to interpolate and extrapolate their responses to figure out what’s on their mind. "The two most important days of your life are the day that – Navjot Sidhu, It’s always darkest before the dawn.
John C. Maxwell, http://shareinspirequotes.blogspot.com/2013/05/stay-stupid-or-fight-for-being-smart.html, http://www.searchquotes.com/quotes/about/Intelligence/, http://funny-quotes.picphotos.net/smart-clever-quotes-about-sayings-visit-ourinteresting-quotes-similar/recycledsurfboards.com*change-quotes-and-sayings-funny-11.jpg, https://www.pinterest.com/pin/540924605219271291/, http://funny-quotes.picphotos.net/you-are-idiot-funny-quotes-loves-fun-world/funnyloves.com*wp-content*uploads*2013*09*936456_461532527270108_1778097070_n-300x290.jpg, http://funny-pictures.picphotos.net/the-funny-thing-about-being-smart-is-that-you-can-get-through-most-of/https:**i.chzbgr.com*maxw500*7598845440*he395ba3e*, http://partyinvitationsideas.com/fc443b3/78-quotes-about-reading-unique-teaching-resources-.html, http://imgarcade.com/1/smart-people-quotes/, http://funnydailyquotes.com/c/quotes-pretty-funny-quotes-about-being-intelligent, http://www.picturequotes.com/there-is-something-exciting-about-being-in-an-environment-in-which-its-really-cool-to-be-smart-quote-4771. School: 2+2=4 Are you one of them?
Smart (586 quotes) A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them. – Franklin P. Jones, A fanatic is one who sticks to his guns whether they’re loaded or not. I am sitting here looking at the most amazing person I have ever seen, smart, funny, caring, and absolutely stunning!
Pretty funny. You can tell how boring a person is by the lack of fear in their eyes when someone is flipping through photos on their phone.
Smartasses seize the moment while you are too busy over there being uptight. All I'm sayin' is if you caught me then you were speeding too. I think he was right. My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them. – Jerry Seinfeld. – Brad Pitt, If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.
– Franklin P. Jones, Copyright © 2006-2020 - All rights reserved. 8778 matching entries found.
Votes: 6 Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway. It’s either my mum or my dad.
– Tryon Edwards, The toughest question has always been, “How do you get your ideas?” How do you answer that? – Lynn Johnston, Anybody who thinks talk is cheap should get some legal advice. “Everything in life has the potential to be funny. – Chetan Bhagat, Everyone is a psycho, and the average of all psychos is what we call normal. Being a black woman, there's so many different sides of us. “The mind replays what the heart can’t delete.” People who are funny and smart and return phone calls get much better press than people who are just funny and smart. Exam: Leila has 2 apples, her train left 9 minutes early, Calculate the sun’s mass. Lord, give me patience because if you give me strength then I’m gonna need some bail money. Just the way it never rains when you have an umbrella, you’ll never run into people if you look fantastic. We get so worried about being pretty.
Lord, give me patience because if you give me strength then I’m gonna need some bail money. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years. As a writer, you get to play, you get alter time, you get to come up with the smart lines and the clever comebacks you wish you'd thought of.
The same applies when you are stupid. – Oscar Wilde, When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn’t want to be seen with him in public. Maxwell Smart: 99, I'm positive that this is the section of the rail that gave way.
– Trevor Noah. Flip Wilson, A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them.